If you think airport screening is the only thing these days that's all about nudity, stop in for lunch at Torch Bistro, Sushi and Marine Bar in Punta Gorda Florida. The resort town is just up the state’s west coast from Fort Myers.

When you go to the sushi buffet table, you’ll find a nearly nude young woman lying there. In addition to filling your eyes, you can fill your plate with Asian food bits that are placed on her arms, legs and torso at various ladylike spots. Customers love the idea, especially the guys.

Apparently, there’s nothing illegal about the food-on-babe presentation. The Florida Department of Business and Professional Regulation inspected the set-up and has no objection, as long as “all food contact surfaces be smooth and easily cleaned." Actually, the edible food doesn’t touch the girl’s body, because each piece is presented on a leat or seaweed plate.

So, next time you’re going through security at the airport, glue some food pieces on your vital parts and offer those groping screeners a bite.

On your next flight, would you enjoy a dinner of roast dinosaur? There are several scientific studies going on that examine the diet of Stone Age humans. The rumor is that cruise lines, airlines and hotel chains are interested in serving foods that include more natural and healthy ingredients.

Actually, just kidding about dinosaur on the menu. If you ever stayed awake in history class, you’d know those beasts were gone from the earth several million years before man arrived. However, the cavemen's simple diet, primarily of meats, is considered healthy for today’s humans by some nutrition experts. Just don’t try convincing a vegan of that.

Stone Age people were hunter-gathers who found food, primarily animals, within short distances of where they lived. They did eat some wild grasses and beans, but researchers claim vitamin-rich liver, kidneys and brains were their favorites. By the way, have those researchers considered that cavemen died at 30 of old age?

Remember back in the days before you got smart about puffing cigarettes while filling your lungs with killer smoke? All restaurants and bars were clouded with choking air. Even at work, you had to share the nicotine-loaded environment.

We go way back to the real early days, when movie houses, cars, buses, trains and planes allowed smoking. Most restaurants encouraged addicts to puff out clouds of poison as you tried to enjoy your meal. Girls in shorts clomped through bars, clubs and dining rooms cooing, “Cigars, cigarettes, cancer?”

Stand still, dummy, while we scan you

Scanner images will now look less like a naked you, because only a virtual you will be on display that looks like a store dummy or undressed blow-up doll.

New and revised full-body airport scanners, created by OSI's Rapiscan Systems, will be a bit more considerate than previous scanners. They’ll just show security examiners a less human and more robotic image of you. If they suspect any item on your body image, the scanner will highlight it, and screeners may opt to take you aside for a more thorough personal search.

OSI, which calls the new generic images avatars, has replaced or updated 194 scanners at 51 airports to date. So, maybe when you go on your next flight, you won’t have to cringe at the near-naked image of the real you up on that scanner screen. You'll see only a digital dummy of about the same size and shape, but not shaking with embarassment.