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Free Cruises For Single Male Dance Partners PDF Print E-mail


Remember “Out To Sea”, the final movie comedy made in 1997 by long-time actor pals Walter Matthew and Jack Lemmon? The characters got a free sailing for signing on as male escorts with a single women’s cruise. As hilariously improbable as the plot may seem, the practice still flourishes today on both ocean and river cruises.

If you’re a senior bachelor or widower and would enjoy a free cruise, check with your travel agent and various cruise line websites for upcoming escort opportunities. Of course, the requirements for prospective escorts are a bit strict. You must be an excellent ballroom dancer, in good physical condition, provide references and possess the appropriate wardrobe.

You’re required to restrict evening closeness with feminine dance partners only within the ship’s ballroom. And never, never attempt to heat up the dancing in a private stateroom, lifeboat or other hide-away area.

 
Europe To USA Flights: No Laptops In Passenger Areas PDF Print E-mail


There’s growing concern of potential terrorist explosives built into portable computers. To protect westbound flights, the Department of Homeland Security now requires that laptop-size computers must be inspected and checked with baggage.

This adds to the ban already in place for flights to the USA from airports in North Africa and the Middle East. Therefore, if you’re planning to use a computer when returning from European flights, bring along a smartphone with all the features necessary for work or play. Or if you’re really old-fashioned, a good book and/or several print magazines.

 
SW Pilot Presents Gifts To His One Millionth Passenger PDF Print E-mail


Veteran of 21 years flying with Southwest, Captain John Charles Ritchie, shared the occasion with a surprised passenger in her cabin seat. In addition to offering champagne, the pilot personally reimbursed her for the price of her ticket.

Then, with a sweet smile on his face, he grabbed the passenger, dragged her down the aisle and tossed her off the flight. Oooops, wait a minute. I’m wrong! That happened on several other airlines recently, but not on Southwest.

 
CNN Reports: AA Squeezing In On Cheap Seats PDF Print E-mail


As if it weren’t cramped enough already for creaky seniors flying economy. Get ready to squoosh! Seating spaces are reducing in American Airlines passenger compartments. The plan is to cut another two inches from each row.

Of course, in case you haven’t noticed, other airlines are also doing more squeezing for the same obvious reason. By sardining added bodies into the passenger areas, they’ll make more money. However, it could get worse on Delta and United, because it will give their goons less space for dragging passengers down the aisles and out the door.

 
OAG Ranks Airlines With Baddest On-Time Reps PDF Print E-mail


The British air travel intelligence service was founded in 1929 when passenger aircraft were just emerging. OAG recently rated the US airlines with the most frequent unflier records.

At the top of the list and bottom of on-time records are United, Southwest and American. According to the OAG report, Delta and Hawaiian Airlines are the most reliable.

Of course, as any experienced senior frequent flier will tell you, it’s all based on random luck. On any given day of crowded skies the list can be reversed. Bad weather, mechanical troubles, jammed runways, passengers being dragged off and many other factors can cause delays.

 
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