Q: OK, before I begin my gripe, call me a nasty old man. That said, I believe cruise ships should ban children under age 12. I spent many years working so I could enjoy my well-deserved retirement. I love cruises, but not when the ship is full of screaming, out-of-control brats who hog the pools, spas, buffets, passageways, elevators and everywhere else they spawn. Am I wrong with this Scrooge attitude?

A: Cool it, man. There are solutions to your problem. First of all, families can take their little darlings out to sea by booking ‘em for a kid-themed Disney cruise or other line that offers certain cruises specifically to include kids. We don’t advise old goats like y... we mean ... seasoned citizens to sign up for those, unless you bring along your grandkids. 

On the other hand, didn’t we fight several wars to protect “freedom of the seas”. If families have the money to pay for a cruise, they’re entitled to bring anyone they choose. Of course, some clueless parents take their kids on cruises and then set them loose to run wild. However, they’re no worse trouble than drunken adults or gangs of rowdy college students.

We just returned from a short holiday cruise from LA to Acapulco. It was loaded with kids, and we don’t remember any extreme bad behavior at all. In fact, it was a delight to see the kids enjoy themselves. Yes, there was some daytime crowding at the spas, pools and buffets. We just waited until well after dark to enjoy the facilities when they were practically empty, and with no kids anywhere around, just a few boozy adults.    

Check on the internet or with travel agencies for listings of cruises designated primarily for adults only, if that’s your wish. Bottom line: don’t blame parents for wanting their children to enjoy the many pleasures of ocean travel and visits to exciting ports around the world.