Other than what Congress does with our tax dollars, is the Washington DC area ready for gambling? It’s still very early in the approval stage, but MGM has proposed a casino resort development in the Maryland town of National Harbor. It’s just eight miles and across the Potomac River from the White House.

The Beltway location is very popular, and a year or so ago, Disney seriously proposed a theme park there. Although it never happened, the urge to develop the riverside area is still alive, and this MGM project is just as ambitious.

We thought and thought about it, and now suggest some not-too-sane ideas for appropriate features for that proposed gambling mecca facing Washington DC:

Capitol City One-Armed-Bandits: You bet U.S. Treasury money with Congress and never see it again.

Plush Pentagon Resort: Here you get to play with drones. Not the flying kind. You’ll frolic with real drones, the Pentagon’s armchair generals and admirals.

Smithsonian Casino: Visitors will see now extinct objects, such as an honest politician, vintage gas pump showing the price of $1.50 a gallon and an ancient airline ticket without the 50% add ons. The exhibit would include Barack Obama’s actual birth certificate, and Mitt Romney’s Book of Mormon. The one he carried door-to-door to convert heathens and independent voters.

Hillary’s Pillory: If you gamble against the Secretary of State running for President in 2016, you could end up in stocks. Not the wooden torture kind. Much worse, you’re forced to buy Wall Street stocks from Bernie Madoff.

Finally, visit the Clinton Oval Office and Bingo Palace on Halloween night. Write your own disturbing description for Bill’s trick or treat surprise.